The betrayal

I don't know who betrayed me first. Maybe it was my father, the day he decided to leave me. Maybe it was my first group of friends who never stuck by me. Whichever way you look at things, I am not liked or likeable, and this has caused a great sense of betrayal.

I remember one girl who first spoke to me and asked me to be her boyfriend. That was my first brush with romance. It was a rather twisted episode and I trace it through many suburban days playing in the trees with the insects and animals. 

Who was watching me? Was it God? Someone was looking at me and in my naive childish way, I thought they were trying to butcher me the whole time? Someone seemed to be betraying me. Was it God. 

The betrayal spread its roots to my late teenage years. I hated people and judged them harshly. I wanted to be a lone wolf and it gave me an angry scowl most of the time, which I thought looked handsome. It obviously wasn't because I had such a low success rate with anything relating to society.