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Throw a dog a bone

 Girls make a million excuses to avoid being with the guy who isn't the one they're interested in at that moment.  They keep a bunch of sausages on the backburner most times.  This one girl who I liked said her tonsils were out and she couldn't make it after 3 months of love emojis and this kind of thing. Then it was something else. She said she was in a dating relationship. Only, there was no evidence on IG. Women change their minds all the time and they don't like to be forced to meet someone.  Maybe they just like talking to you on the DM's for an ego boost. One thing's for sure though; If you try to force them to meet they back out quicker than an alleyway cat before a pile of exploding excrement.
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No pRon til 50. Day 20: Age 37.577

 I'm sick of people and angry at times that they didn't help me get to where I needed to be. I know this is a low-value way to look at things. Don't worry, I know...


I always feel I should be anywhere but here. The money isn't good enough. The people are dumb... Yes, I'm surrounded by dumb people and I'm sick of it. 

Maybe having a family isn't "it". But I feel that I'm owed some more respect than what I presently attain to. This feeling is that I'm the outsider and I've got nothing that they want and they've got nothing that I want. 

I'm feeling trapped; claustrophobic. As if nobody understands what I need because it's too deep for them. No woman, no boss; not even myself. Only God. I will either get what I'm looking for or I will die long before. I don't care what it takes though, I'll go all in. 

I crave intensity and risk. I don't want to be the same as everyone else. These scumbags are all the same. They want from me and they have been ripped off themselves so fair enough. BalcRcok and VnagRaud have taken everything and AI will allow them to take the last. . . 

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