No pRon til 50. Day 6: Age 37.442

 Flee from youthful lusts

When we hear such a statement it's not like we jump for joy. I sure as hell didn't jump out of bed at 4:40 which is the time I woke up today, and I'm sorry I didn't. But part of it is for just that very reason: Fleeing from something isn't enough. I've tried to flee from things maybe my whole life. IT JUST DON'T WORK BABY. 

So what I've started doing is living ultra-healthy. This eliminates not just one but two major pitfalls: namely; It's an immediate payoff and it actually opens your eyes to the glory of what's possible. When we exercise we release endorphins that can't be released any other way but through exercise. 

Last night I did not do the whole barbeque thing but rather joined the guys over at the church. I realize that I despise foolishness. It's a fault of mine, but it seems to me that the church has become largely irrelevant in today's modern world. And that doesn't fly well with me. There are major questions that kids ask when in and fresh out of university that churches aren't willing to answer.

And yet the only way to treat the Bible is as a true text. This means that 90 percent of culture is poisoned with un-truth and this makes Christians ultra-unsteady. They feel as if they've got to tow two lines: both the worldly line and the line that makes them Christian. This is why Christianity - true Christianity - is on the decline. With the likes of Jordan Peterson spouting ideas like "Richard Dawkins is actually more Christian than he realizes," the quality of Christianity is at stake too. 

So suffice it to say, the need to flee from youthful lusts has been taken away from us. The marketing machine that runs the world is the new religion, and it thrives off sxx. This is why it's so damn hard to quit pRon. If you think about it hard enough though, you will find God in everything. 


200 pushups per day and 200 squats

So this is the goal, though it's by no means even been  implemented. But it's a worthy goal because I'm sort of jealous of those in their 20's and the advice for those in their 20's. From my perspective they know nothing of life and they don't deserve its benefits, especially the women. The other day I saw something on Instagram advising people in their 20's to do at least 200 of each and I was like "Right! I'mma do'it!"

Insidious forces at work

So how did all this start? 

I saw this Jenny-on-the-block type figure in the South East Asian country where I am. Well, on Tinder at least. She was flaming hot and always in the gym apparently. So being a schmuck I decided to hit up her DMs. Originally she didn't respond. Then I tried some wacky things. I took n00ds of my back because c0ck-shots are so very gross and unreminiscent of anything playful. I mean full frontal back. Don't ask me how that works. I don't want to go into the details. 

And lo-and-behold, what did she do? She replied my goodness. She did! It was a glorious day in my life  o my brothers, 'ound and 'orny bugger that I was, or so  I-thought. It was the opposite, but sometimes we think that this is our window of opportunity and in many cases we're dead wrong. And well the first thing I did was to try my damndest to get her to meet me, but as you may well imagine, she lost interest as my excitement grew. I even went so far as offering her hard cash for services rendered. 

Then she found out who I was. Unbeknownst to me she had been asking probing questions the whole time and because there is a small expat community here she could triangulate roughly who I was on on the day that I came to her gym she sent me a DM after a long silence: "Was it you? Are you so-and-so's ex". And after a period of evasion she blocked me. Then I went down to her beauty studio which is on her FB page which I'd been DMing and I dropped off a note. Then she sent me another message saying it's okay. 

But is it? I mean I only dropped off that note out of pure shock and horror about what might occur had I not. I was still going to the gym high on the possibility that she'd accept me; and the thing was, she'd blocked me because I was using a fake account and she'd found out I was going from account to account. But like I say, I was sending message after message and going to gym every day because I thought I could show courage. Maybe I could have but being blind on lust, I didn't know that she wasn't the right woman for me. Dirty and hot, yes, but bad for my life trajectory. Moreover, she was wasteful of my life-blood and my energy as all dirty hot things are.